Do you smoke? bite your nails? overeat? In truth, we can all let go of a bad habit or two. With these five following tips, it may be easier to quit than you imagine.

Here they are:

1. Commitment. Make sure this is something you truly want to accomplish. It’s wonderful to “talk the talk,” but you’ll need to back that up by “walking the walk” as well. Be honest with yourself. Do you truly believe that this is the right time to kick your bad habit? Remember, it has to be done for the right reasons.

• Don’t let yourself be pressured by others. Search your soul and be certain you’re doing this for only one person – you! It’s your time and energy you’ll be using to make your goal a reality, so make your decision carefully.

2. Start a journal. Jot down every time you practice your bad habit. This isn’t to be used as a punishment, but to give you more of an idea when your undesired behavior is occurring, so that you can better devise ways to break it.

• Include your thoughts and feelings that precede or accompany the behavior. This can give you an idea if you’re doing this when you’re under stress, bored, tired, and so on. Though it may seem time consuming at first, recording these thoughts and actions can be a wonderful tool to speed up your success in breaking the habit.

3. Choose an alternative behavior. This behavior can either remind you of your desire to quit or be a permanent replacement of your bad behavior with a desirable one instead.

• For example, a friend of mine once put a rubber band on her wrist when she was quitting smoking. Each time she had the urge to light up a cigarette, she would snap the rubber band on her wrist instead. Naturally, this was only temporary to remind her not to smoke.
• Some more ideas are to take a walk, read a book, sing a song, or cook. Any activity can be used as an alternative behavior. Of course, you don’t want to replace one bad habit with another one, but anything that can redirect your focus works well.

4. Start a replacement schedule right away. Start immediately replacing your bad habit with your alternative, but a gradual shift may work better for you than a complete change.

• You may want to start with once a week, then maybe twice week, then three times, until you’re consistently practicing your alternative behavior instead of the bad habit.
• Remember, this won’t happen overnight, so please practice patience. People learn different behaviors at a different pace. Don’t be discouraged if your best friend stopped smoking in three weeks and you’re on your fifth week and still craving a cigarette.

5. Don’t keep this a secret. If you’ve made the decision to break a habit, tell others. This is the time when you need the support of your family and friends to help you be successful.

• Whether you succeed or not, you’ve taken a major leap in a positive direction. That’s why it’s so important to share what you hope to accomplish with family and friends. Those who love you will be there to encourage you, offer support, and help you wherever they can.

Breaking a bad habit can be difficult, but it isn’t impossible. Use these techniques to make your journey easier, then celebrate your accomplishment when you’ve succeeded – you deserve it!

Today, I’m going to cross-post a video from TED TV, where Alain de Botton talks about a kinder, gentler definition of success.

In it, he makes several key points that are extremely relevant in the current world’s hype about the Law of Attraction (although he doesn’t call it that) and your current status (are you a winner or a loser). He also talks about how envy and self-esteem fit into the social umbrella of our lives.

He’s articulate and elegant, and every entrepreneur — or anyone pursuing a personal goal of sorts — can benefit from listening to this man.

What do you think of getting a low grade on a report card? Dropping out of school? Getting fired?

• My lowest score in school was actually the one I worked the hardest for (I was an A student with a “C” in Shakespeare)
• I dropped out of high school (still don’t have it) and went on to complete my Master’s degree with an overall average of 80%
• I’ve been fired countless times, and all have propelled me forward to fantastic places.

This isn’t to brag. It is to show you that while failure may involve negative thoughts and emotions, it can also make you stronger or wiser. I’m willing to bet that you have your own stories of so-called failures that have catapulted you to unexpected successes, whether it be as an entrepreneur or otherwise.

A simple definition of failure is: An act or instance of failing or proving unsuccessful; lack of success. Let me emphasis the word “simple.”

When I think of this definition of failure, I’m reminded of Thomas Edison, the inventor of the light bulb. While there are many conflicting stories of how many times Edison “failed” at inventing the electric light bulb, most agree it was in the thousands before he found the right combination of materials.

One of Edison’s most famous quotes is, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work. I am not discouraged because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.”

If you adopt this same attitude, you’ll overcome your feelings of failure and be able to see your dreams and desires come to fruition.

• Robert Schuller stated these famous words, “Failure doesn’t mean you’re a failure; it just means you haven’t succeeded yet.”
• Henry Ford said, “Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently.”

When you consider those words from these wise and successful people, you’ll truly begin to understand the power of failure.

The truth is, you only fail when you give up! When you keep trying until you’ve found the answer or the solution, you’re successful.

You’d never say Thomas Edison, Robert Schuller or Henry Ford were failures would you? Sure, they were unsuccessful many, many times, but they didn’t give up until they found the answer, the right procedure or the right materials to solve their dilemma.

In case those quotes weren’t enough to make you believe failure has a positive power and strength, here are some more you might relate to:

• “Failure is an event, never a person.” – William D. Brown

The next time you try your hand at something and don’t achieve the desired result immediately, remember failure is an event; it’s not you.

• Bill Cosby also said it well when he said, “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.”

If you’re trying to please everyone, you can’t possibly succeed!

• “Never confuse a single defeat with final defeat.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald
• “You can’t have any successes until you can accept failures.” – George Cukor

Just because you’ve failed once, twice or 10,000 times at something, it doesn’t mean you’re a failure. You only fail when you stop trying.

Still not convinced? How about this:

• “You always pass failure on your way to success.” – Mickey Rooney

What do these words mean to you? No matter what you’re trying to succeed at, whether it’s a sport, project, career, invention, or at school, there will be times when you don’t succeed. But you mustn’t let that stop you from reaching your goals, dreams, and desires.

The common thread among all these famous people and their wise words is the same. You can’t have success without failure. Never give up and never stop trying. There is power in failure, you just have to give yourself a chance.

Keep trying, keep failing and soon you’ll find true success!

To your failing forward!

Britt Santowski

Have you ever wondered to speed up your path to success?

One of the smartest things you can do is to learn from someone else, someone who has already accomplished what it is that you are setting out to do. You MUST learn learn learn from someone who has traveled the road upon which you wish to go.

Thank god I practice what I preach (I mean teach!). I inundate myself with books and audio recordings (my car is traveling PDU — personal development university), and I take courses constantly. The list of what I have learned from who (whom?) is rather extensive, and if you’re into reading these dull lists, see my About Britt page, and check out my Books page — which is a list of books that I have personally read and endorse.

One of the most life-changing courses I ever took (and the course BTW that put me on my current path), is a local course taught here by an organization called Wealth by Design. They have a moneymatters bootcamp, and it offered to change our MENTAL relationship with money. My husband took the first-ever course, and I took the second. From there, armed with an alternative mindset, we catapulted into a new life.

Where we will land is still up in the air (I’m work with the analogy here), but it will be close to our destination. Funnily enough, I was at the Wealth by Design Expo just this Saturday, and one of their speaker’s made reference to mid-air adjustments. We are doing those too! Grin.

Life on our new path has been FAR from perfect. Failures abound. But having said that, the FIRST thing a pre-toddler does when she sets out to walk for the first time, she falls; the second thing she does is … falls; the third thing she does is … you guessed it … falls. Anyone watching an infant learning to walk knows that black and blue is their new and temporary natural skin tone.

Anything that you do for the first, second, third time is destined to fail (Colonel Sanders failed 1009 times in trying to sell his recipe; Edison failed anywhere from 200 – 2000 times with his lightbulb — depends who you read; while most of us give up on the first, second, if not third failure!).

Anyways, I’m not hear today to harp about failure (though it is my favorite topic!). I’m hear today to talk about learning, and how learning can shape your destiny. How it can CHANGE your destiny.

Once you have identified your passion and your niche, it’s time to get busy building buddies aka mentorship relations.

My next “speed injection” will be from Patrick Snow, author of Create Your Own Destiny.

I say “speed injection” as I have taken what Isaac Newton said to heart: “If I have seen further it is only by standing on the shoulders of giants.” I will learn from Patrick, who is only three degrees away Napoleon Hill, and four away from Andrew Carnegie. from That, my friends, is the power of mentoring! Find someone who has achieved what you want, and then learn from them.

Over the next few months, watch me grow new wings, flutter, fall, and get back up again. Rince and Repeat a few times. And then succeed. And flourish. And explode into the world.

The question you must ask yourself is: Do you want to climb the ladder to success, rung by rung, or do YOU want to catapult to the top, and reach new peaks and heights, more than you ever imagined?

I’ll take the latter, not the ladder!

So, shall I see YOU at the top too? Who can you find to mentor with? Better yet, who in your MIND would you like to mentor with? Set your sights high!

To your trip to the top,

Britt Santowski

Okay, so that’s just a title. Really, wearing a dress has nothing to do with overcoming obstacles. Though granted, a woman may look better in the dress than some men (and I do mean some, for others look better in a dress than I do!). But I digress. Already. And the day has just begun. Uh oh!

Anyway, back in the real world, what I meant to write was…

In order to be successful as an entrepreneur, you have to overcome a great many things. These “things” can typically divided into one of two categories (can’t everything?): Internal, and External.

Internal obstacles, though usually the HARDEST to overcome, are also the ones that are the most under your own control. External obstacles you can respond or react to.

External Obstacles

The number one way to deal with external obstacles is to have CLARITY. Understand your vision. Know exactly what it is you’re trying to do. Have some goal. You can’t just run in without a plan of some kind. Take the time to plan out your goals and the steps you intend to take to reach them.

• Even with an exceptional plan, the reality is that things rarely go exactly as you’d expect. You’ll have to stop and make changes at times, and that’s okay! Be prepared for the unexpected with ideas on how to handle a situation if it arises.
• Identify the parts of your plan that may become problematic and lay out alternatives.

Good planning will help you deal with the external obstacles when you get there. That, and a great imagination. Remember that there are ALWAYS multiple ways to solve a problem. One of my favorite memory acronyms for dealing with external obstacles is TLC: You can Take it, Leave it, or Change it.

Internal Obstacles

Some of those obstacles are created internally. Doubt, fear, and self depreciation are some of the more common culprits. You can overcome these self-created obstacles with a little hard work and determination.

Trust yourself. You’re in charge of your journey to success. You set your goals and you’re the one making it happen, so you must trust yourself. If you truly have a great passion for what you’re going to do, then you’ll be the best judge of what you want.

• Follow your instincts. That little voice in the back of your head may very well end up telling you exactly what you need to succeed in your goals.
• Nix the nay-sayers. There is no shortage of these people. Even though they are typically coming from a good place in their heart (they either don’t want to lose your friendship and be left behind, so they hold you back; or, they are trying to “protect” you from disappointment and failure and don’t know enough that any entrepreneur fails their way to success), set them aside for the time being. Find the one or two people that champion your idea. That will nurture this newborn with as much love, care and enthusiasm as you do. Then, once you have momentum on your side, THEN bring in the nay-sayers. But sparingly. And sift through the emotion to get to the content. It’s YOUR job to maintain your vision, your dream, your passion, not theirs.

Also, get help. You will need it. No success is ever achieved in a vacuum (unless you ARE a vacuum, and then it’s a different story). If there’s something in your way and it’s too big of an obstacle for you to remove on your own, get help! You can’t do everything by yourself. As humans, we’re social beings and we need help from those around us.

• Get your friends, family or co-workers involved and welcome their input on how to get around an obstacle in your path. This will bring in new ideas and fresh perspectives on the problem in ways you may have never considered.

Remember to periodically step back (or aside) and gain a fresh perspective. There are times when, no matter how hard you try, things just don’t go your way. This is where you need to stop, take a step back, and look at things from a different perspective.

• You become used to your routine, so the fine details can easily slip past you. Take a break and walk away for a little bit. Change your focus for a time; then come back to the problem and you may see something you missed.

Finally, and I can’t emphasize this enough, never ever give up. Nothing has ever been solved or accomplished by giving up. Vince Lombardi said it best: “Winners never quit and quitters never win!” This is as true as it gets.

• Being too rigid on something can be counterproductive. In order to succeed, we sometimes have to change our approach completely. Keep at the problem until you find a solution. It’s there; you just have to find it.

Sometimes you may find you need to start again. Sometimes, despite all your efforts, you need to rebuild from the ground up. Maybe one of your fundamental ideas was wrong and had an effect on everything else. This happens, and while it’s a setback, it’s not the end of your dream.

With a little more effort and hard work, you can do it!

Being successful isn’t easy and it involves a lot of hard work, dedication and sometimes sacrifices. With these tips, a good plan, and positive people around you to help, you can accomplish anything you set your mind to.

To your success my friend!

Britt

Do you suffer from Fear of the Unknown? Of course you do! To some extent, all women (an men too) do. And it’s especially more so for the NEW entrepreneur, because she is navigating the abyss between the known (the past way of doing things) and the unknown (her new business).

That’s why there is a term for  the thing that keeps us locked in our status quo, no matter if it’s good or bad for us: the Comfort Zone. (Although it SOUNDS good, the “Comfort Zone” is what keeps you in a dead-end job or in a dead-end relationship, because the Fear of the Unknown supersedes the Comfort Zone.)

Overcoming the Fear of the Unknown is a challenging endeavor, but it can be done. If you suffer from a fear of uncertainty, understanding what fear is, and how it affects you, can start you on the road to conquering it.

Fear has been defined in several ways; however, the most basic definition of fear is an emotional response based on the fact that we’re faced with something unfamiliar or impending danger.

When we experience fear, several psychological and physiological responses take place all at the same time.

Psychological events include feeling emotionally overwhelmed, having high levels of anxiety, and even feeling terrified. Physiological responses include a faster heart rate, shallow breathing, and similar effects.

Experiencing fear can greatly impact your view on life, your confidence levels, and even the potential that you have as an individual.

Here’s an example of a situation where a woman had the crippling fear that everything she did would result in failure:

Janice was very successful in her career and personal life. It seemed that people were instantly drawn to her and her ideas, but on the inside, Janice was a mess.

Every time she worked on a project, she would throw herself into it. In the end, she would ultimately succeed, but on the inside, she was always worried that she would fail or that her completed project wouldn’t be good enough.

For the most part, she recognized the fact that her fear was irrational. However, Janice grew up in an abusive home. She was physically beaten and consistently ridiculed by her father. Regardless of what she did, it was never enough to meet his expectations.

The result was that she grew up to become a workaholic, often struggling to finish several things at once, and leaving very little time for herself.

The root of her fear of failure was grounded in her childhood. Her father harbored unrealistically high expectations and would be mentally and physically abusive towards her when his expectations weren’t met. Once she realized this about her past, Janice was able to ease her personal expectations and overcome her fear.

Here are some strategies you can use to help overcome your fear:

1. Recognize your fears. By realizing that you’re fearful, you’re more likely to get to the bottom of what the fear is.

• You may also have a fear of facing your fears. The best way to conquer this fear is to accept the truth behind what’s causing you to experience limited happiness in life.
• You might come to understand that you’re afraid of failing or taking chances. You may even be fearful because you simply don’t have confidence in yourself.
• Regardless of the issue at hand, it’s important that you recognize your fear and attempt to define what it is that makes you terrified of the unknown. The key here is not to dwell on your fear, but rather to understand precisely what it is you’re worried about.

2. Determine the underlying root of your fears. How can you identify the cause of your fears? An insightful look at your life might reveal the answer. By recognizing what causes your fears, it’s likely you can overcome them with great success!

3. Face your fears. Once you’ve accepted your fear and identified the root cause, you’re ready to conquer it! The best method to do this is to face it head on.

• Make a decision to purposely tackle your fears by indulging yourself in activities that push you outside of your comfort zone. For example, put yourself in a place where you’re safe, yet uncomfortable, or respectfully confront someone from your past. In the end, you’ll find that you can successfully overcome your fears, one by one!

Overcoming your fear of the unknown is a difficult undertaking. However, if you take the time to engage in these three steps, you’ll discover a renewed peace and happiness within your heart!

As you work to unlock the chains that bind you to your fears, you’ll enjoy a freedom that you’ve never felt before.